I never thought I’d be one of the directionless, lost ones. Growing up, I felt ambitious, brilliant, confident. I wanted to help people and change the world. Then over the course of about two months, my whole world flipped upside down. What followed was heartbreaking chaos and a period of questioning everything I’d ever known and everything I’d ever thought to be true about who I was. If I were to consider that moment an earthquake, there were aftershocks for several years that kept me from healing. There wasn’t much left to hold on to, and I tried to push away what was left. I ended up deeply depressed, anxious, paralyzed by a fear that showed up as rage bubbling just below the surface, and I made myself completely unavailable for connections with other people. Bit by bit, over the past several years, I’ve mostly put myself back together. I resemble the girl I used to be, but nothing is quite where it was before (and I’m better, kinder, and more compassionate for it). Now I write to help other women with anxiety, depression, and aimlessness, and I plan to start coaching soon, too. -@thatoldkitchentable
In all directions.